OK, maybe it's not just women, but so far I've only seen this among my female acquaintances.

A while back I met someone for lunch that I hadn't seen in a while. When she ordered a vegetarian dish,  I casually asked "Are you no longer eating meat?" She affirmed that yes, she was no longer eating meat....because her husband didn't, and she "couldn't think of a good enough argument against his." I was stunned. This was a person I had known most of my life, who had always been a strong individual and appeared pretty self-assured. And had always eaten and enjoyed meat. I wouldn't have minded if she had come up with this plan on her own. I know many vegetarians/non-meat eaters and respect their reasons, for moral or health or allergies or religious beliefs or just dislike of the taste. But I was NOT expecting her to say it was because her husband didn't want her to. What?!

I thought about it and realized that she wasn't the first person I've known to do this...I've known a few other people who stopped eating meat once they started being involved with vegetarians, even though their partner didn't seem to care and didn't ask them to do it. One woman was kind of wishy washy/passive anyway, and always seemed to change her interests to reflect the interests of whoever she was dating, but another was a woman with a big personality who loved food and had a strong sense of individualism....or so I thought. These people were only giving up meat because their partners had...not because of any strong sense of right or wrong or buying into their partners' philosophies. Bah!

There's nothing wrong with showing support, meeting someone halfway, finding compromise, doing something out of respect for another person's beliefs and lifestyle. But I get uncomfortable when it looks like someone is compromising themselves too much. I don't push my vegetarian friends to eat steaks, claiming it's good for them and they don't know what they're missing. I wouldn't nag my boyfriend to eat meat if he were vegetarian and wasn't into it. And I wouldn't try to stop him or any of my friends from eating meat if I were vegetarian. And my cool veggie friends say no thanks, but respect my love for a big old steak.

I just had to get this off my chest...it's been bothering me for a while. I just wish everyone, man or woman, would just be true to their selves. Eat what you want to eat! Do what you want to do! Otherwise, you end up in my blog!